Adventures in Plumbing

I get home last night from work, thinking of the nice and relaxing evening I had planned: no class, no commitments, just a little TV, a little Price of Persia Battles on the DS, a cool drink... ah...

I hadn't even got my shoes off when Kim says, "Honey, a tornado went through our bathroom." Uh oh.

Our bathroom sink never drained very fast, and often it would slow up enough that we would get out Liquid Plumber and that would fix it for a couple months, but never completely clear it. Well yesterday the clog finally clogged for good such that the water in the sink would not drain at all. Kim tried the Liquid Plumber but it failed to loosen the goop this time. So she got the big wrench and took off the air trap part of the drain (i.e. the part of the pipe that forms a "U". Goop and water fell into the bucket and she cleaned out some really nasty stuff out of the pipe, but not enough to cause the blockage. The problem must be farther down the pipe and she was unable to reach very far with a coat hanger to get much out.

Enter Bill. I appraise the situation and move into action. First I go to the hardware store and by a ten dollar drain snake. And some fuses and lightblubs on sale, but that is neither here nor there. I then snake out the pipe as far as I can, quite a disgusting job really. I of course tried to wash my hands without the pipe reconnected and got water all over the floor. Clean up and cursing ensues. I then proceed to reattach the air trap and run the water. No go. The sink fills up once again. Hmmmmm.

The problem must be deeper, I figure, so I head to the basement. In the confusion of pipes leading to the main drain (kitchen sink, bathtub, and bath sink all lead to same junction) I take a few minutes to determine which one is the guilty culprit and I proceed to hesitantly take off the end cap of a straight length of pipe where I suspect the blockage might be. Or at the very least tell me if its above or below this point. Well let me tell you, make sure you have some old towels around when you try something like this because as the cap came off goopy sink water sprayed and splashed and got me wet. It was quite gross. I won't begin to describe what some of the goop that came out of that hole looked like but suffice to say I would not have been surprised had it reared up and tried to absorb me like some ginormous mutant amoeba.

After that pleasant experience, I had Kim turn the sink on and I observe the water coming down and out the cap end and into my pail with no issue. So the problem must be farther down and I retrieve the drain snake once again to poke and prod in a desperate last ditch attempt to do something constructive. After snaking as far as I could, I put the cap back on and ran the water. Still no drain. ARRRRGGGGG!!!!

One last ditch plan is up my sleeve. I remove the pipe cap once more (and again thoroughly disgusted by the goop that comes out with the water) to drain the pipe. Then I scoot up to the hardware store to make a second purchase, this time for heavy duty Drano Max Gel, the best stuff you can find this side of industrial use chemicals. At home I replace the cap on the drained pipes and pour half the bottle of Drano into the sink and let it sit for half and hour. While waiting I was going to play on Kim's Nintendo DS but strangely I cannot find it. Did someone take it to their massage with them? How odd. I wouldn't think you could play a game and get a massage at the same time.

Back to the problem at hand. I reluctantly enter the bathroom and turn on the hot water. It seems to be working... yes.... yes....NO!!!! The sink begins to fill up. I hang my head in despair as I let the water run in a hopeless act of desperation that a bit more hot water will make a difference. The sink almost full, I turn it off and watch despondently as it sits in perfect stillness. For a few moments I stood there, racking my brain to see if there was any more ideas other than giving up and calling a plumber, when suddenly...

*GURGLE* *FLUSH* *DRAIN*

The clog is gone! The water drains! Bill is VICTORIUS!

Depspite being quite drained from my efforts (pun intended) I feel I tremendous accomplishment, a very manly feeling of self-sufficiency. If ever my job in computers doesn't work out, maybe I'll become a plumber. I've for the perfect butt crack for it.