Same Sex Marriage

Same sex marriage (aka SSM)is hot in the news again since the Supreme Court of Canada ruled recently that it was constitutional.

Andrew at Bound By Gravity proposes the true Canadian solution would involve compromise by both the proponents and opponents of SSM, creating legal equivalence between Civil Unions and Marriages with the former being for Gays and Lesbians and the latter for heterosexuals.

That got a lot of feedback, including this post by Captain Flynn of Against All Flags pointing out that segregation didn't work in the South for Caucasians and Negroes, it won't work for homosexuals and heterosexuals.

Curt also posted in response to Andrew, putting up this defense for saying no to SSM on his blog, pointing out that being against SSM is not the same as being against Homosexuals.

And one last post I'll point to, where Jay Currie asks why should polygamy should be proscribed from our culture when it is allowed in all but name already.

A lot of reading, lots of points, and lots of thinking to do. I came to my conclusions about this issue so let me take you on the path I took to get where I did.

What marriages do we currently disallow in our society today?
- you cannot marry non-humans
- you cannot marry children (i.e. underaged people)
- you cannot marry a close relative
- you cannot marry more than one person at the same time

The first is because you need acquiescence from the person you are marrying and we are currently unable to perfectly communicate and understand other species. We may think we can or feel like we can, but the reality is that we cannot and may never be able to.

The second is because children are not mature enough to make decisions for themselves. They have neither the life experience or fully developed reasoning abilities required to make such a commitment.

The third is because it is genetically unsafe should any children come of the relationship.

Polygamy is proscribed because our culture doesn't like it, much like it has issues with SSM.

Some opponents of SSM claim that allowing gays to marry would open the "floodgates" to removing the restrictions of the above four proscribed marriages. While I agree that if we allow SSM we should honestly consider polygamy as a possibility, but I don't think the reasons we disallow the other three cases suddenly become invalid.

So we come to Same Sex Marriage itself. I believe it should be allowed, I believe it should have the same name as marriage, and I believe it should be done post haste. I see no reasons why we would not allow gays to have the same freedom as heterosexuals to join together in matrimony. As long as they are both consenting adults entering into it of free will, I see no problem with it.

The name should be marriage because calling it something different cheapens it in my opinion. At the same time, I believe the gay community should be willing to cut some slack to the opponents of Same Sex Marriage and give up the label so long as they achieve legal equality. Andrew in his post made some good points about meeting halfway for both sides, and fighting an all or nothing war does not solve problems, it creates enemies.

Finally, I feel that polygamy is ok as long as it is entered into willingly by adults with full knowledge of what they are getting into. I am strongly opposed to the polygamy practiced by what I consider cults in some parts of Canada and the U.S. where young girls are forced into marriages with much older men by religious brainwashing and domineering parents.

I don't know if this post made much sense. Its such a diverse topic with many angles, but in the end for me it comes down to equality and tolerance.